Tuesday, July 05, 2005

174. Bruce

"Batman" is, for now at least, a thing of the past.

It has been almost a week since my first contact with Gustavus. We meet tomorrow at Wayne Manor to discuss my "case"--not an easy task given that I can tell him virtually nothing of my history or my motivations for associating with him.

As for the latter, I am not entirely sure I can express even to myself what it is that has driven me to this step, beyond a need to explore who I am and what it is I want from this life. My feelings for Richard have led me to acknowledge the desires I hold for other men as well. For years now I have placed myself in dangerous situations, telling myself it was a quest to avenge injustice. An impossible mission, I now realize--and what if its very impossibility is what has kept me going? Batman was doomed to fail, and fail I did. So now what?