Tuesday, August 16, 2005

186. Bruce

Been a week since G imposed the ban. He's been exploiting it ever since, bringing me ever closer to the point of explosion and then pulling back. Can't think. Can barely move sometimes, the pain is so great. Pressure building up inside me. Want to let it out. Need to let it out.

i know i don't sound like myself. i'm not myself anymore. i'm not who i was.

i can't hold it in much longer.

There were times when i thought i could do anything, fight anyone, be anything i wanted to be. i thought i had power. i thought i had purpose. But i know better. i know better now.